My life with the condiment slut

I have just counted 58 condiments in our refrigerator.
I had to give the butter up for adoption.
The eggs are sullen, but that's to be expected
because everyone knows eggs hate to be crowded.
The orange juice tried to mate with the milk.
Bad things happen to good food when there is over population.
But it's going to be ok.
I have a hit planned for 6am tomorrow,
long before the condiment slut will stumble from his burrow.
It will be ugly. There WILL be recriminations.
But life will go on. It will thrive in the fresh breezes.
Till the next time I let him go to the store alone.